*Crickets Chirping*

I know it's been a little quiet around here lately. I promise I have been hard at work!
However, in all seriousness, you will have to excuse my lack of blogging a little longer.
Paul's Gran passed this morning. While we rejoice in knowing that she gazes upon her Maker's face, we still grieve our earthly loss. We appreciate your prayers for our family.
Jess

Consumed with self doubt...

Reassurance in Him.

This is so humbling. I try not to mix my blog with too much personal stuff, but I think this goes way beyond pictures of Collin. (Even though he is super cute!)
If you feel led, leave your story in a comment.

Cardboard Testimonies

Are you ready for some football????!!!

I am!!!! I have to admit, I've been waiting for football season since February 4th, and I can't wait to watch the Cowboys! Love me some Romo!

The shoemaker whose kids had no shoes...

Everyone says the same thing when they find out I'm a photographer. "You must take pictures of Collin all the time!" Sadly, the answer is no. I was really good when he was first born; I took pictures every month.
Now, not so much, and all of my family is begging me for pictures, but it just always seems to be the last thing on my mind. So I took some a few weeks ago. Get ready for a cuteness overload!

His dad makes this face all the time! Collin looks so much like Paul it's scary!

Ponderings

I sometimes fantasize about what my business would be like if Paul and I would have waited to have children. I think of the extra money we would have to spend on the business, the workshops I would be able to attend if I weren't worried about leaving my family, the weddings I would accept if family time were not a factor, my office that wouldn't be consumed with toys, and the time I would have to just work.

With every job I take, I think of what I'm giving up. I worry that Collin spends too much time playing by himself without me being able to play with him. Then when I crawl on the floor and we read books, roll balls, learn colors, roll balls, sing abc's, roll balls, tickle, and did I mention rolling balls? Yeah, rolling balls is big fun in our house. I think about the albums I need to be working on and the pictures I need to be editing and the wedding invitations that aren't quite finished yet. And don't even get me started on the house, because on any given day, it's pretty much a disaster! It has been so hard to find that balance, and it's something I struggle with daily.

I guess the point of my rambling is this: I don't know one other mother who doesn't feel the same way. Every decision we make, we question. "Is working what's best for the family? What am I giving up; what am I gaining? What about my needs as a person, not just a mother?"

I love my job with everything I have in me, and I'm so glad that I have been able to work from home. I'm learning to put the guilt aside, because I really do have the best of both worlds. I get to do my job which I love so very much, keep my customers happy, and watch my son grow up. So, the majority of my summer will be spent playing in the sand box and at Castaway Cove and in the floor rolling balls; because I wouldn't miss this time to be Lauren Clark (an incredibly awesome photographer)! And while I do sometimes imagine what my business would be like without Collin, I could never imagine my life without him.

Workee Work, Busy Bee!

Wow! This was one crazy, busy weekend. On Saturday morning I drove to Fort Worth to take Lucy's bridals. She is so awesome! (and cute and funny!) When I commented about her changing her face in every picture, her response - "I've been watching America's Next Top Model" she kept me laughing the whole time. Now I really can't wait for her wedding, because I know how much fun it is going to be!
Then Sunday, I drove back to the Dallas area for a work shop. It was a great chance to get some shots that I wouldn't normally take.
So, after driving for about 10 hours this weekend, I'm pooped! Paul's going on vacation next week, and I've decided I am too! I've got weddings booked for July, but nothing else! So, to not do anything but shoot on the weekends and edit during the week, that's a vacation!
Anyway, enough rambling, time to see the goods! The first is from the workshop, and the rest are of Lucy.

Robyn's Shower

One of my best gal pals had her bridal shower this weekend. The big day is getting closer!

Three Years

Today is mine and Paul's 3 year anniversary. It seems like we've been together forever. I am so blessed!

Happy Easter!

photography joke

How many photographers does it take to change a light bulb?
50- 1 to change the bulb and 49 to say, "i could have done that."

All the cool kids are doing it...

Random facts about me- I'm copying and not numbering; there's no way I'll ever make it to 50!

This is my first blog, ever. I'm terrified of birds. My family and I have the same weird sense of humor, but we think we're hilarious. I still call my mom "mommy." I call my dad "daddy-o." My favorite smells are rain, the coast, and the heater when it comes on for the first time of the year. My favorite holiday is Thanksgiving. Holidays are so much more fun now that I have Collin. I cry easily, but I may be the only woman alive that didn't cry over Titanic. I'm extremely organized, but only about certain things. My closet is separated by style and color. It's very important to me that I'm taken seriously. I changed my major three times and still don't have a degree, but I want one desperately. I want to travel, but I'm scared of breaking a law and being thrown into a foreign prison. I love, love, love art history. I'm scared of becoming a woman who is defined by her children; "Hi, I'm Collin's mom," please don't ever let that be me! The smell of cigarette smoke nauseates me. I have recently detached myself from people who didn't make my life better, and in doing so, my life became better. I am trying to accept the fact that Collin thinks the dog is way funnier than I am. My first celebrity crush was David Bowie as the Goblin King in The Labyrinth, I was about 5, and oh, how I loved him! I have a rock solid faith, but I'm still very open minded and accepting. I love old Hollywood glamor. My husband is my best friend. I wish it weren't bad for your skin to tan! I think Jim and Pam are the new Ross and Rachel. Paul and I have a rating system for McDonald's fries. If I get sick, I lay on the couch and watch Disney movies all day. I think South Park is hilarious, but I wouldn't want Collin to watch it. I hate when good books are made into bad movies.

Wow, okay that's enough for one day!